re: Where would you move to in PNW?

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Hard to say without knowing your interests.

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Short answer is that Seattle is a bit more "cosmopolitan", in close proximity to a lot of things to do. Portland also has a lot to do but feels like a large Olympia to me.

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Something I know we always mention because it usually matters.

OP, no state income tax in Oregon although if you choose Bend it'll be worth it.

If it matters I might choose the Seattle area. Although the traffic might not be worth it.

OP, knowing the area where your wife would be working would help too.