re: Being There For A Parent That Abandoned You And Has Been A Source Of Pain Your Entire Life

Exactly.

I’m not going to go out of my way to reform a relationship with her, but I also wouldn’t want to harbor the same amount of hate towards her in her last moments. It would make me no better a person if I didn’t at least make amends with her. Because in the end she is your mom and she did carry you around and into this world for 9 months. Without her you aren’t where you are, and no matter what there is no one else in this world that could say the same.

That said it isn’t something that I would be able to easily forgive. It would be tough but the tougher thing would be living in regret knowing I never said goodbye.

As for the OP as a friend of the family I would stay out of the situation and let it go it’s own way. It’s going to be tough either way for the brother and the sister. The most they will need is your support.