re: Welp....here's a new one with the SO

OP... I agree with you. Both of you should represent the other, in public, as well-mannered individuals. Holding a fork right should not be something that's too much to ask. It would drive me fricking insane, honestly.

Your SO should handle a little coaching in this much better than she does. You're not wrong.

But always remember what Dale Brown said. Whenever you point a finger at someone, expect many more pointing back at you. You batter make sure your manners and public image are super sharp, because I guarantee she will look for the opportunity to come at you over it.

That's why you need to bring up these things very gently with people, as though you are genuinely interested in helping them, and not just telling them to change something for your benefit.

Good luck.