re: What's the funniest thing you've come up with organically?

You're damn right I'm ugly as sin. I make babies cry and milk curdle. I once tried to ask a bank teller out on a date and she handed me a bag of money so my face would stop assaulting her.

But I can beat a whole room in a staring contest, and a life of being teased teaches you to either give as good as you get or quit bitching.

Better an butt-ugly nerd with a poetry problem than an unfit mother.