re: Meeting my daughter - Very Nervous ( * UPDATED * )

Yep. Been there. Done that. Here's what I learned the hard way.

It's best to arrive home as an extended "guest". Mama has been running the show all this time, so respect her and let her continue to do so. You do not run the roost. Kids (even really little ones) sense when the leadership structure in the home is in flux or is unsteady.

Now for the baby. Rule #1. Every kid is different.

Kid #1: Folks (and myself) tried to force me upon the kiddo, and the kiddo upon me. I was ok with it, but the baby knew I was different and reacted adversely....he could simply smell the difference between me and Mama.

I learned to take it slowly...to just be a helping guest. Start out in the kid's vicinity (not even talking to him), then gradually make eye contact and progress to help with feeding and diapers. What I found to break ground was to lay on my back on the floor with the kiddo. Not even interacting, but just letting him check me out to ensure I was OK. Then increase to facial interaction, then eventually play and then to snuggling.

Kid #2:
She was an instant match. Just put her on my chest for nap within 30 minutes of getting home and she settled in like I had been there from day one. Zero introduction issues.

I was retired and at home when the other 3 were born. The big thing to remember is that each kid will be different...very different. it's imperative that you first be attuned to the baby's cues to see what kind of personality your wee one has and then adjust your approach from there.

Also, be prepared to get it "wrong" a few times before you figure out what works. That's just part of the process and it's normal.