re: Trump needs to call out these judges hand and force them to arrest him

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Did the judge say he couldn't attend his son's graduation?

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No. He declined to rule today (a full month in advance of the graduation ceremony) that he would recess court on that day, in order for Trump to attend. He did, however, state that he would revisit the issue as the date approaches and perhaps allow a recess if the trial is not behind schedule. LINK

There are a number of issues here, and it does appear (at first glance) that the judge is being unreasonable, but not as much so, if you look a bit deeper.

The first question is whether the trial could just proceed on that one day, with Trump not in attendance. Unfortunately, the governing NY rule of procedure says that this is not possible, so long as the prosecution objects to the absence of the Defendant.

Why? The answer is that the fact finder (here, the jury) has the right to watch the demeanor of a Defendant during a criminal trial and to assess that demeanor in determining guilt. If a Defendant were allowed to simply "skip" his trial and send his attorneys, a jury would be denied that opportunity. This is very-obviously the reason for this near-universal rule. Seriously, take a moment and ask yourself how you would feel if EVERY criminal Defendant had the option of hiding from the jury during his trial.

So, why not just announce today that there will be a one-day recess on the date of Barron's graduation? It seems reasonable, if you look at it from the perspective of ONE Defendant, in ONE trial, pending in ONE court.

But if you give a Donald Trump permission to delay a trial to go attend some personal or family event or ceremony, do you really doubt that EVERY Defendant, in EVERY case, in EVERY court will promptly find (or create) events or ceremonies to delay their trials?

And how does that affect OTHER Defendants, in OTHER case, set for trial subsequently in the same court? How many times will justice be delayed, because a trial "went long" to allow a Defendant to attend the wedding of Cousin Carlos or the funeral of Auntie Annabelle? How many Defendants will be denied the "speedy trial" guaranteed by the Constitution and have their charges dismissed for that reason?

In short, there ARE reasons for this ruling, and they are NOT all tied to some conspiracy to harm Donald Trump.. Of course, that is NOT to say that such a desire might be playing a role here, especially in the prosecution declining to acquiesce to a one-day absence.