re: My daughter passed away...

quote:

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I am so sorry, Hurricane. Praying for you and your wife.

Having gone through virtually the same thing about 20 years ago myself, I would like to offer some advice:

1. It will take you months before you can make it through a day without crying

2. It will take you years before you can make it through a week without crying.

3. I will let you know how long it takes to get thru a month without crying when I find out.

4. Don't let the grief drive a distance between your wife & yourself. Share, talk, hug, cry together. I read somewhere that the divorce rate for parents who go through something like this is shockingly high because it is a huge stress.

5. Get grief counseling. I probably wouldn't be here if I didn't see a psychiatrist to help with the overwhelming pain and grief. Get someone who specializes in grief counseling. Seek out support groups. There are many of us out here (I didn't realize the number of acquaintances that I had that had similar losses until I suffered mine).

6. it will get better because it sure as hell can't get worse...what you went through is probably the worst thing that could happen to a person

I'm glad you got to hold your daughter. I got to hold mine. That's why the worst day of my life is also the best day.

Hang in there brother.

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All of this is great advice. I lost two children 2 years ago. They passed about 2 1/2 months apart. My 20 year old son to cancer and my 26 year old to an overdose. Another thing I would add to the advice above is to keep your mind occupied. Down time is the worst time. When their birthdays or anniversaries of their death come around I make damn sure I keep myself busy that day. Lean on friends and family.
I don't know you but I will say a prayer for you and your family.