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7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by indianswim 
on 2/23/21 at 2:49 pm
on 2/23/21 at 2:49 pm
12
0quote:
More and more corporations are requiring their employees to be less white, in an attempt to stop racism forever. But it's hard to know how to do that, since at first blush, that SEEMS really racist and impossible. But it's not. It's actually really easy if you follow these seven simple steps:
1. Burn all your Live, Laugh, Love signs. This is the first step to renouncing whiteness. Find every last "Live, Laugh, Love" sign in your home, every "Too Blessed To Be Stressed" trinket, and every "All I Need Is A Little Bit Of Coffee And A Whole Lot Of Jesus" mug and burn them as you think about your inherently sinful whiteness.
2. Rip off your skin. This is an easy one!
3. Kill yourself. Even easier! For best results, rip off your skin, then kill yourself.
4. Announce that you identify as a person of color. Wait, never mind. This one might be cultural appropriation. You also might be mistaken for a conservative trying to come up with a third joke.
5. Throw out all your ranch dressing. Ranch dressing, mayo -- it's all gotta go.
6. Take dance classes. This is a hard step, but it's worth it. As you learn to dance to a beat, your whiteness will begin to melt away.
7. Hate yourself every waking moment until you have sufficiently atoned for your whiteness. Oops! Spoiler alert: you'll never sufficiently atone for your whiteness. Better go back to step 3.
There you go! Racism ended forever!
It's hard to tell these days, but it's the Bee.
I don't think Coca-Cola is too far off from this.
This post was edited on 2/23 at 2:50 pm
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by bstew3006 
on 2/23/21 at 2:51 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 2:51 pm to indianswimMy favorite was to be less ignorant
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by Crimson Wraith 
on 2/23/21 at 2:53 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 2:53 pm to indianswimI identify as black.
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by BlackHelicopterPilot 
on 2/23/21 at 2:54 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 2:54 pm to indianswim1. Dance better
2. Play basketball better
3. Do math worse
4. Lose 200 pts from your Credit Score
5. Get penis enlargement
Welcome to the community!
2. Play basketball better
3. Do math worse
4. Lose 200 pts from your Credit Score
5. Get penis enlargement
Welcome to the community!
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by TigerOnTheMountain 
on 2/23/21 at 2:56 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 2:56 pm to indianswim
Actual white supremacists have to be loving what’s going on right now. The morons on the left give them validation every time they push this anti white narrative.
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re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by bluedragon 
on 2/23/21 at 2:58 pm to BlackHelicopterPilot
on 2/23/21 at 2:58 pm to BlackHelicopterPilotI got called in for a diversity awareness class .....
I went to Oklahoma
Got called in again.
Another wind farm in Oregon.
Got called in again.
Wind farm in Ontario.
Received my graduation certificate from HR. Did not take the class.
I went to Oklahoma
Got called in again.
Another wind farm in Oregon.
Got called in again.
Wind farm in Ontario.
Received my graduation certificate from HR. Did not take the class.
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by Weekend Warrior79 on 2/23/21 at 3:11 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 3:11 pm to indianswimquote:
5. Throw out all your ranch dressing. Ranch dressing, mayo -- it's all gotta go.
Done, what do I win?
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by Monday on 2/23/21 at 3:18 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 3:18 pm to indianswimquote:
1. Burn all your Live, Laugh, Love signs. This is the first step to renouncing whiteness. Find every last "Live, Laugh, Love" sign in your home, every "Too Blessed To Be Stressed" trinket, and every "All I Need Is A Little Bit Of Coffee And A Whole Lot Of Jesus" mug and burn them as you think about your inherently sinful whiteness.
This one got me.
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by AURaptor on 2/23/21 at 3:33 pm to indianswim
on 2/23/21 at 3:33 pm to indianswimquote:
5. Throw out all your ranch dressing. Ranch dressing, mayo -- it's all gotta go
I'll give you mayo. I can live with out it.
The rest of it, go frick yourself.
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by BiteMe2020 on 2/23/21 at 3:38 pm to indianswim
I feel incredibly neglected. In all of this gender/race identification nonsense, I've been completely ignored.
I self identify as a multi-state lottery winner. I've written Texas, my home state, which laughed at me and told me it was a nice joke, all the way to the tri-state lottos up north, which simply told me to write back later as their programs are further developed.
I want my winnings. I identify as the lotto winner. I want my money. But nobody's paying attention. I feel really disenfranchised and robbed.
I self identify as a multi-state lottery winner. I've written Texas, my home state, which laughed at me and told me it was a nice joke, all the way to the tri-state lottos up north, which simply told me to write back later as their programs are further developed.
I want my winnings. I identify as the lotto winner. I want my money. But nobody's paying attention. I feel really disenfranchised and robbed.
re: 7 Ways to be Less WhitePosted by Ailsa on 2/23/21 at 4:07 pm to indianswim
That's the same as asking any other race to cease being who they are. It sounds like a power grab to dominate/oppress/annihilate.
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