what is your definition of adultery?

off work, got time, no kids for a short while, pretty down at the moment. i'll bounce back up and my spirit will lift. i always do.

back to the topic.

obviously there is the jody definition. pretty self explanatory but also very basic. something lead up to jody.

since i asked, i'll go with mine. it may be different. it certainly contributed to why i am now divorced. no cheating, none of that stuff. each of us took care of ourselves not some digusting slob either and hygiene was never an issue. have good careers all that stuff. i really believe people who were close to us were shocked when they found out or figured out we weren't together anymore.

my understanding, whether right or wrong, of the defintion is a violation of the marriage contract. she withheld sexual interaction with me and she committed adultery of a sexual nature, albeit a very different kind of adultery.

our religion and church don't tolerate her committing adultery by having sex with someone other than me. why should it tolerate her "adultery" of refusing to have sex with me?

basically, in a not so fancy way of describing it, i could count on two hands and still have enough fingers left over to tell you how many times i would have sex with my wife while married in a given year. it was miserable. it started off "good" and then evaporated. i suspect i was (or am) just like many of you in terms of the why (if replies are honest) such as poor communication, selfishness, disrepectful at times, kids, work, priorities unfortunately changed, all that stuff that we take for granted while caught up in it.

and for all that are on the dating apps slaying the puss, my hat is off to you. i just can't bring myself to do that (yet).

i have reservations that when i meet someone, this person may similar in some regards to my ex, because there are many great qualities that would be (and still be) attractive to me that i hope to find in another person. i realize each person and situation is different, but it is a concern. i know the line, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone. is there some truth to that?


edited to add that i just reread this after typing it. today is a shite day for me.

also, i understand and agree with most people definition and admit i was wrong with my definiton. i'm not chagning my post, i'll leave it up as is.