I love the smell of rubbing alcohol. Today I had an accident.

I stopped using gel sanitizer years ago due to the stickiness and fragrant smells. To my family’s chagrin, I keep a bottle of isopropyl in my truck for cleaning up hands after school, after gym, etc…it works especially good if you are out hunting or fishing and don’t want the lingering smells.

While driving today, I decided to grab the bottle just for a whiff. I forgot that I had just topped it off and ended up squirting a fair amount of isopropyl directly into my left nostril while taking a deep breath. I don’t know exactly how much went in, but it was enough that it went through my sinuses and down my throat.

Within 15 seconds my left eye was watering and refusing to open. Within an hour I had so much inflammation in my left sinuses that I couldn’t even force air through. It felt like someone had shoved raw chicken liver up my nose.

My wife says this will be an embarrassing way to die. I say it’s better than accidentally choking yourself to death while masturbating.