"Foot in mouth" close calls or actual fails

When’s the baby due?

I’m not pregnant

Wtf is this shite at almost midnight?

I help manage a rental property, and the tenants at the time were black. I had a text thread going with them about some repairs they needed. At the same time I had another text thread going with some friends who were out fishing and we were going to meet up after they were done. They were taking a while, so I text what I thought was my friend saying “You ni**as still fishing?” , but accidentally sent it on the tenants text thread.

They were cool about it luckily. I had to go see them to get a copy of the key the following week and they were laughing about it, thank God

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I help manage a rental property, and the tenants at the time were black. I had a text thread going with them about some repairs they needed. At the same time I had another text thread going with some friends who were out fishing and we were going to meet up after they were done. They were taking a while, so I text what I thought was my friend saying “You ni**as still fishing?” , but accidentally sent it on the tenants text thread.

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Oh shite

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I would just because but definitely fire her afterwards.

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Would you poke her face?

She’s going to sue you and win you idiot.

But you seem cool otherwise.

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She’s going to sue you and win you idiot.

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Probably not

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But you seem cool otherwise.

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Probably not

Eta
I can't be the only one who reads the first line as not only will she sue me, but she'll also win me. That changes the game to be honest.

Back in the early 90’s, I was at LSU and in the national guard. One month at drill, we had about 10 people come from active army, into the guard. One was a really cool black guy, Mr Athlete, built, etc, super nice guy. He was in Germany active duty before joining the guard. We were military police. I forget his name, so let’s call him Smith.
Another person came from active duty over seas. She was a loud, obnoxious, fat (OT-zero), white girl. She was a cook. I forget her name, so let’s call her Jones.
First day that semester at LSU, I have Mr Smith in a class. I’m sitting next to him, we are shooting the shite, talking about the unit. He mentions a few things and people he doesn’t like about the unit, etc.
I reply, “You know who I cannot stand?, that loud, fat, & nasty Mrs Jones!” (Extract words I used, ingrained in my memory to this day)

He turns to me and says in the calmest voice, “That’s my wife.”

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When’s the baby due?

I’m not pregnant

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Yeah, I told a girl she looked like she lost weight, she told me "no, I just lost my baby." I felt like Hitler.

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I only know the song bc the Bubble Guppies performed it but as ‘Pencil Case’ for their back to school song - Bubble Guppies is on Nick Jr.

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no clue what bubble guppies are either but with it being on Nick jr I have to assume it’s a children’s show lol