- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
Chinese Military Will Now Be Trained To Shout Wrong Pronouns At American Troops-BB
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:33 am
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:33 am
Of course it’s the bee, but these days...
quote:
BEIJING—The Chinese military has announced that they will no longer be investing in weapons, tanks, aircraft, or traditional warfare training techniques. Instead, the People's Liberation Army will simply be trained to shout the wrong pronouns at U.S. soldiers, who will collapse and shake uncontrollably at the advanced maneuver.
"Brave soldiers of the People's Liberation Army, prepare to launch a pronoun assault!" cried one platoon leader in a training exercise. "Go!"
The Chinese soldiers then began shouting "He/Him!" and "She/Her!" at American soldiers, whom Biden had loaned to the Chinese government for the practice session. They immediately collapsed to the floor. "No!!! I'm a xe/xer; it says so right on my dog tags!" cried one weeping American soldier huddled in the corner in the fetal position, rocking back and forth. "You can't call me the wrong pronoun -- it's literally violence! It's against the Geneva Convention!"
"President Biden will be hearing about this!" he shouted as he ran away.
"See? That's all we need to do to defeat the puny American soldiers," said the sergeant. "We don't even need to fire a shot. We just need to say the mean words they don't like."
A recent computer simulation predicted that using this tactic, the Chinese military would defeat America in approximately seven minutes.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:34 am to fr33manator
Damn them! That’s our new vulnerability!
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:34 am to fr33manator
Well, our new troops will lay down their weapons and sky scream, so it will work.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:38 am to fr33manator
The results will be similar to this
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:39 am to fr33manator
Is this where we insist that Bee articles are offensive because they use satire and make fun of my world view?
And then posters assume my gender by saying that I have sand in my vagina?
And then posters assume my gender by saying that I have sand in my vagina?
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:41 am to fr33manator
One day, we’re going to look back at the Bee and realize it wasn’t satire after all.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:45 am to fr33manator
It’s so funny cause I could see this being a real headline!!
You could write better satire than this drivel in your sleep.
quote:
fr33manator
You could write better satire than this drivel in your sleep.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 7:49 am to NawlinsTiger9
If the future is remote controlled drones....nerdy gender confused people will probably be just fine behind the screen playing with their joystick.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 8:29 am to NawlinsTiger9
The bee really sets some of y’all off doesn’t it.
You should aim to deplatform them if you aren’t already
You should aim to deplatform them if you aren’t already
Posted on 3/22/21 at 8:32 am to fr33manator
Welcome to Biden's and the left's America.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 8:55 am to fr33manator
American troops under Biden:
What do mean we have to defend this country? I can't my new vagina hasn't healed up yet the surgery was 2 months ago.
What do mean we have to defend this country? I can't my new vagina hasn't healed up yet the surgery was 2 months ago.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 8:58 am to fr33manator
Fake story.
At least one GI would demand to see the Chinese Sergeant.
At least one GI would demand to see the Chinese Sergeant.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 8:59 am to fr33manator
is this like a weakass right wing onion?
Posted on 3/22/21 at 9:09 am to geauxjuice
quote:
is this like a weakass right wing onion?
Welcome to last year. It’s actually a pretty strongass right wing onion.
Posted on 3/22/21 at 9:11 am to NawlinsTiger9
quote:
You could write better satire than this drivel in your sleep.
I write much better when I am awake.
Asleep it’s all weird sex dreams about Helen Keller in a Zeppelin.
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News