Were you frugal in your 20’s?

No, and I regret it to this day.

My twenties were most a mistake. Wish I could go kick my arse for being so stupid.

We lived in a $499/month apartment on HWY 280 (nice-ish area of BHam). Instead of socking away a bunch of cash for a few years, we bought a house after nine months...and watched out home value collapse with the market.

We also ate food like it was free.

What do you do for fun? For me, my work is in the middle of nowhere 10 hours away from my friends and family. I can’t just go to the bar at night with the boys. I’d have to take off work and drive or fly down to see loved ones. Just struggling with how often I can afford to do that.

In theory, I agree that you shouldn’t simply save save save in your 20s. As long as you’re saving for retirement, have an emergency reserve, aren’t stacking up more debt, and can comfortably cover your expenses, then sure, enjoy yourself.

BUT, enjoying yourself shouldn’t mean traveling home to see friends and family on a monthly basis. It’s time to find new friends.....no, seriously. Cultivate some new interests and friends in your city/town. Join a club, group, take a class, do some volunteer work....find people who share your interests, and explore some new interests. You’re living in a new place, explore it and see what and who are out there.

Yes but I’m miserable, but can’t think of spending it on anything I’d enjoy.

I was on the frugal end of the spectrum.

Most days it has afforded my family to do things my peers can’t do in their mid 30’s.


I didn’t miss many things in my 20’s that I wanted to do. You just need to budget for it and pay cash for it vs revolving credit.

Eh, frugal by default. Living off 20k a year or so while going to school. Spent all of it and don't regret it. And yes, I know that sounds like an oxymoron to say I was frugal while spending all my income, but I don't think you can spend much less to survive unless you're getting government assistance.

I do wish I spent less on booze and more on traveling then though. I picked that up a little bit later and feel behind.

Got into the mortgage biz in my 20’s. Just as sub prime came online. It was a magical time of cell phones with shitty cameras before selfies and social media made every single fun, reckless, stupid or crazy thing you did last forever.

Pissed away a metric shite ton of cash. Did some crazy shite. But wasn’t prepared or mature or disciplined enough for a commissioned sales environment. Do I wish I could go back? Absolutely. But I waffle on why.

I can see ratcheting down and marshaling those resources and building something for myself and my family in a business sense. But I can also definitely say coming out on the other side alive and kicking and with the experience and perspective I have has made me the dumbass I am today...and I would absolutely never want to trade that. Which being focused back then would have required the sacrifice of all that fun.

Maybe when I’m 60 and I’m struggling with Flomax and trying to figure out who’s gonna be wiping by butt in 10 years when I can’t anymore, I might answer differently. But for now, I feel as if I wouldn’t change much.

TL;DR

OP, go find some Asian Hooks and Blowcaine and stop overthinking life.

Is this a permanent job location or just a temporary project? I got sent out to the middle of nowhere for a 2 year project and was in a similar situation where it costs a lot to go back and see my friends and family and there wasnt much to do for fun near me. Since I knew it was temporary I took advantage of the opportunity to just try to better myself. Read books, learn about the markets, work out, maybe pick up spanish or something. I also started maxing out a roth, 401k, and HSA. The goal was that when my project ended and I could go back to civilization I would be in a much better position in life. Smarter, richer, fitter, more attractive, more mature, etc. In the meantime I still set aside a percentage of my income for travel and would take 2-3 vacations a year. I also set aside a bit of money to play around in the stock market...not a lot, but just enough to start learning how it works

If I was in your position I would save every penny I could. By the time you are in your 30's you could live the rest of your life like you want.