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Started By
Message
re: How do you feel about women farts?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:05 pm to CaliforniaTiger
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:05 pm to CaliforniaTiger
quote:
But what about poontang farts?
you talking about a queef?...if so, I love them. Bring forth the queef and you are the king...
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:08 pm to Tuscaloosa
quote:
What was your response to said experience?
Both played it off like nothing happened, finished giving her the business. Haven't spoken to her since
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:08 pm to Walt OReilly
quote:If only there was ONE word that succinctly combined these TWO words...
not proper
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:10 pm to CecilShortsHisPants
Not a fan. Very un-ladylike. Farts are a man thing. If a woman rips one and lets it just hang out there she is a trashy woman.
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:16 pm to glassman
quote:
Y'all way too uptight.
Or is your lady too loose?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:18 pm to WaltTeevens
Not at all. Just don't really care about something so trivial.
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:20 pm to CecilShortsHisPants
quote:
Posted by CecilShortsHisPants Just told my story about the one that ripped in my face mid-69.
Subtle brag thred then?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:20 pm to glassman
I like the little bit of mystery left. Call me old fashioned.
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:20 pm to LSUballs
My woman don't fart either
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:22 pm to WaltTeevens
quote:
I like the little bit of mystery left. Call me old fashioned.
No problem. I'll say one night after eating Vietnamese we had a Fart War going on. It was pretty funny and no soiling of the sheets.
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:24 pm to CecilShortsHisPants
Did you laugh?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:29 pm to CecilShortsHisPants
quote:
I'm down with queefs. Farts can be tolerated if she's a 9 or a 10. Anything under utterly disgusts me
Soooo... What did you do when the chick farted in your face?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:34 pm to CecilShortsHisPants
If you fart in front of her and don't let her do the same you're a fricking a-hole. You can just let it rip but make her hold it in?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:42 pm to Melvin
Truth. As long as its not in my face I really dont give a shite.
Ten years of marriage there is gonna be some farts thrown around. I would actually feel weird if she never let one go in that amount of time.
Ten years of marriage there is gonna be some farts thrown around. I would actually feel weird if she never let one go in that amount of time.
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:42 pm to Thurber
More than 10 years of marriage and my wife has only farted 3 times in my presence. They were all accidental.
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:44 pm to WaltTeevens
quote:no but my lautrec is too loose
Or is your lady too loose?
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:46 pm to Kafka
Depends on how she feels about a frog to the arse
Posted on 12/11/14 at 9:48 pm to CecilShortsHisPants
My sweet little whorish Nora I did as you told me, you dirty little girl, and pulled myself off twice when I read your letter. I am delighted to see that you do like being fricked arseways. Yes, now I can remember that night when I fricked you for so long backwards. It was the dirtiest fricking I ever gave you, darling. My prick was stuck in you for hours, fricking in and out under your upturned rump. I felt your fat sweaty buttocks under my belly and saw your flushed face and mad eyes. At every frick I gave you your shameless tongue came bursting out through your lips and if a gave you a bigger stronger frick than usual, fat dirty farts came spluttering out of your backside. You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fricked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole. It is wonderful to frick a farting woman when every frick drives one out of her. I think I would know Nora’s fart anywhere. I think I could pick hers out in a roomful of farting women. It is a rather girlish noise not like the wet windy fart which I imagine fat wives have. It is sudden and dry and dirty like what a bold girl would let off in fun in a school dormitory at night. I hope Nora will let off no end of her farts in my face so that I may know their smell also.
You say when I go back you will suck me off and you want me to lick your count, you little depraved blackguard. I hope you will surprise me some time when I am asleep dressed, steal over to me with a whore’s glow in your slumberous eyes, gently undo button after button in the fly of my trousers and gently take out your lover’s fat mickey, lap it up in your moist mouth and suck away at it till it gets fatter and stiffer and comes off in your mouth. Sometimes too I shall surprise you asleep, lift up your skirts and open your drawers gently, then lie down gently by you and begin to lick lazily round your bush. You will begin to stir uneasily then I will lick the lips of my darling’s count. You will begin to groan and grunt and sigh and fart with lust in your sleep. Then I will lick up faster and faster like a ravenous dog until your count is a mass of slime and your body wriggling wildly.
Goodnight, my little farting Nora, my dirty little frickbird! There is one lovely word, darling, you have underlined to make me pull myself off better. Write me more about that and yourself, sweetly, dirtier, dirtier.
You say when I go back you will suck me off and you want me to lick your count, you little depraved blackguard. I hope you will surprise me some time when I am asleep dressed, steal over to me with a whore’s glow in your slumberous eyes, gently undo button after button in the fly of my trousers and gently take out your lover’s fat mickey, lap it up in your moist mouth and suck away at it till it gets fatter and stiffer and comes off in your mouth. Sometimes too I shall surprise you asleep, lift up your skirts and open your drawers gently, then lie down gently by you and begin to lick lazily round your bush. You will begin to stir uneasily then I will lick the lips of my darling’s count. You will begin to groan and grunt and sigh and fart with lust in your sleep. Then I will lick up faster and faster like a ravenous dog until your count is a mass of slime and your body wriggling wildly.
Goodnight, my little farting Nora, my dirty little frickbird! There is one lovely word, darling, you have underlined to make me pull myself off better. Write me more about that and yourself, sweetly, dirtier, dirtier.
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