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World Cup Teams To Watch: Onion Edition

Posted on 6/11/14 at 5:09 pm
Posted by EventHorizon
Baton Rouge, LA
Member since Feb 2009
1029 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 5:09 pm
saw it over at r/soccer.

www.theonion.com/articles/fussball

Posted by Downtown Devin Brown
New Orleans, LA
Member since Sep 2013
1523 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 5:44 pm to
quote:

To finish tournament without embarrassing entire country this time


"the French target"

Posted by SUB
Member since Jan 2001
Member since Jan 2009
20756 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 5:53 pm to
This is hilarious.

UNITED STATES
Strength: Ability to return to United States after tournament concludes
Posted by BraveTiger225
Atlanta, GA
Member since May 2008
17662 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 5:56 pm to
ITALY

quote:

Boring As frick: Yup


Posted by rdw1690
Member since Mar 2010
6469 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 5:56 pm to
quote:

Chances Your Friend Will Break Out His Italy Jersey From 10 Years Ago And Suddenly Act Like He Knows About Soccer: Incredibly high

Amazing how many people who have ancestry from Italy become full on fricking Italians whenever Italy is in a major tournament aka all of Jersey and New York.
Posted by cwil177
Baton Rouge
Member since Jun 2011
28422 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 7:44 pm to
Spain:
quote:

Fun Fact: 23-man team currently country’s biggest employer
Posted by Fgiord
America
Member since Nov 2006
4688 posts
Posted on 6/11/14 at 8:11 pm to
That's good stuff.

Too many good lines to quote, but this was my favorite regarding Argentina:

quote:

Weakness:Not a single player on team has ascended to professional ranks of MLS
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