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Message
Having "The Conversation"
Posted on 8/19/14 at 6:44 am
Posted on 8/19/14 at 6:44 am
Guy on CNN just mentioned hating to have The Conversation with his son about how to talk to the police. He is black and I remember hearing that many times in the Trayvon Martin coverage. So I got to thinking.
I'm an old white guy who grew up in Mississippi but I also clearly remember my Dad having The Conversation with me. You don't talk back to cops, you treat them respectfully, you say yes sir and no sir. My wife, who went to Ole Miss, had the same told to her, particularly if she went to Memphis where he didn't trust the city's cops. But it now seems this Conversation thing has become exclusively a one race burden, as if any white, Asian or Hispanic kid can now taunt, cuss or run away from police and get away Scott free. Times have changed.
I'm an old white guy who grew up in Mississippi but I also clearly remember my Dad having The Conversation with me. You don't talk back to cops, you treat them respectfully, you say yes sir and no sir. My wife, who went to Ole Miss, had the same told to her, particularly if she went to Memphis where he didn't trust the city's cops. But it now seems this Conversation thing has become exclusively a one race burden, as if any white, Asian or Hispanic kid can now taunt, cuss or run away from police and get away Scott free. Times have changed.
This post was edited on 8/19/14 at 6:46 am
17
Posted on 8/19/14 at 6:49 am to XKEnut
Friends and I talked about this Saturday night...we are white. We specifically instructed our white children on how to behave if pulled over. Keep your hands on the wheel unless instructed to reach for your documents, be polite, don't argue, say yes sir and no sir. Interestingly, in a town nearby here, there is currently a lawsuit against a police officer for excessive use of force. WHITE cop, WHITE 57 year old man the 'victim'. It's not just black people.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 6:54 am to XKEnut
Wouldn't it be nice if the world just wasn't filled with self centered assholes?
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:00 am to XKEnut
quote:
as if any white, Asian or Hispanic kid can now taunt, cuss or run away from police and get away Scott free.
It's fricking common sense how to talk to anyone in a position of authority if you have respect for authority and don't want to get jammed up. frick people are stupid.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:05 am to baybeefeetz
I'll bust my kids upside the head if they talk disrespectfully to ANYBODY, not just cops.
Sadly, that kind of crap has been engrained in part of urban culture. Just pick any random rapper and you won't have to listen to many songs before you find one that disrespects authority.
Sadly, that kind of crap has been engrained in part of urban culture. Just pick any random rapper and you won't have to listen to many songs before you find one that disrespects authority.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:09 am to XKEnut
quote:
Guy on CNN just mentioned hating to have The Conversation with his son about how to talk to the police.
If someone hates having a conversation with his child about showing respect to law enforcement, something tells me that person probably has never had that same conversation as it relates to other authority figures. I learned to respect adults and authority figures at a very young age, and my wife and I have instilled the same in our child.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:16 am to mtntiger
quote:
If someone hates having a conversation with his child about showing respect to law enforcement, something tells me that person probably has never had that same conversation as it relates to other authority figures. I learned to respect adults and authority figures at a very young age, and my wife and I have instilled the same in our child.
Exactly, and look no further than how teachers are treated by their "students."
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:23 am to baybeefeetz
I don't have default respect for authority and I think most police are scum, but I have the common sense to ACT respectful and avoid conflict with them *because* they are scum and will go out of their way to jam you up if you don't. I'm white and upper middle class. My parents explained to me at a young age that the police are thugs and you have to go along with whatever they say because they'll cause problems in your life otherwise. This is not a "black thing", it's an American thing.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:28 am to XKEnut
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:28 am to XKEnut
When it comes to talking to cops there is a good vid on YouTube that a law professor gives.
Basically, don't talk to them.
Basically, don't talk to them.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:30 am to Cooter Davenport
quote:
I don't have default respect for authority and I think most police are scum, but I have the common sense to ACT respectful and avoid conflict with them *because* they are scum and will go out of their way to jam you up if you don't. I'm white and upper middle class. My parents explained to me at a young age that the police are thugs and you have to go along with whatever they say because they'll cause problems in your life otherwise. This is not a "black thing", it's an American thing.
I would replace your word "most" with "many" and then agree with you.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:31 am to XKEnut
while my dad was mostly absent from actually raising me, i did absorb "the conversation" from the news/movies/tv
and i give "the conversation" to many clients who never got it from a father figure. i give y'all the same thing all the time
don't give them a reason
and i give "the conversation" to many clients who never got it from a father figure. i give y'all the same thing all the time
don't give them a reason
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:33 am to Cooter Davenport
quote:
I don't have default respect for authority and I think most police are scum, but I have the common sense to ACT respectful and avoid conflict with them *because* they are scum and will go out of their way to jam you up if you don't.
exactly
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:33 am to Tchefuncte Tiger
quote:
look no further than how teachers are treated by their "students."
Exactly. Mrs. mtntiger is a teacher, and I hear the horror stories all the time, and race has little to do with it. It's about class and culture.
If you want someone to respect you, then you need to respect the other person first. It's not really that complicated.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:35 am to XKEnut
I was told by my parents how to speak properly to a police officer.
In fact, last week I got pulled over doing 20 over the speed limit by an officer and was polite, didn't BS him and he let me off with a $25 seatbelt fine. It's not the first time either. Being polite foes a long way with many when you consider all of the shite they have to deal with and that in the back of their mind every traffic stop has the potential to become deadly.
In fact, last week I got pulled over doing 20 over the speed limit by an officer and was polite, didn't BS him and he let me off with a $25 seatbelt fine. It's not the first time either. Being polite foes a long way with many when you consider all of the shite they have to deal with and that in the back of their mind every traffic stop has the potential to become deadly.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:36 am to SlowFlowPro
quote:
don't give them a reason
This. Never give someone a club to hit you with.
Don't start nothin', won't be nothin'.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
These are the laws of reciprocity.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:37 am to Semaphore
quote:
January 15, 2009: Alexander Landau and his passenger Addison Hunold were pulled over for an illegal left turn. Officer Randy Murr asked for consent to perform a search of the vehicle. Landau asked to see a warrant, and Officer Murr responded by punching him in the face and knocking him to the ground. Officer Murr, along with officers Ricky Nixon and Tiffany Middleton, then proceeded to beat him for several minutes with police radios and a flashlight. After the beating had stopped, Landau heard one of the officers say, "Where's that warrant now, you fricking ******?". By the time the incident went to court, Officer Murr had been fired because of his involvement in the beating of Michael DeHerrera. Officer Nixon had been fired as well, due to his involvement in an incident at the Denver Diner wherein women were clubbed and maced. The City of Denver agreed to settle the case and gave Landau $795,000.00.[22]
Sometimes you're just screwed.
LINK
This post was edited on 8/19/14 at 7:40 am
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:38 am to XKEnut
As someone said in another thread, white people put up with the same BS from the cops as black people do.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:39 am to Cooter Davenport
quote:
My parents explained to me at a young age that the police are thugs and you have to go along with whatever they say because they'll cause problems in your life otherwise. This is not a "black thing", it's an American thing.
What was their reasoning for teaching you that all cops are scum? Just curious because I know many cops that are decent hardworking people. I know a lot of shitty doctors and lawyers but it doesn't mean that all of them are scum bags.
Posted on 8/19/14 at 7:39 am to kingbob
these groups (including the media and the stupid "am i being detained" assholes) push push push and act SHOCKED when cops push back
believing in rights doesn't mean i believe they should be abused or that we live in a fantasy land where there won't be a response to abuse
believing in rights doesn't mean i believe they should be abused or that we live in a fantasy land where there won't be a response to abuse
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