"There's two kinds of coaches, them that's fired and them that's gonna be fired."
"I always thought I could coach. I just thought people were poor judges of good coaches."
"I've never seen a hammer and tong game like that one." "The harder we played the behinder we got." "Mama always said that if it can't rain on you, you're indoors." (Explaining why he wouldn't wear his cowboy hat in a domed stadium
"Dallas Cowboys may be America's team, but the Houston Oilers are Texas' team."
"I never scrimmage Oilers against Oilers...what for? Houston isn't on our schedule." (Source: The Book of Sports Lists)
(To an official) "Hey, can I, can I tell you one thing? That's three holding penalties on one football team in a quarter and a half. (Pauses) That ain't funny."
(To an official) "Now, you can't do that! If you do it, I'm telling you you'll have more hell over it than a little bit."
(after playing the Steelers for the fifth time in two seasons and planning to meet them a sixth time) "The road to the Super Bowl runs through Pittsburgh, sooner or later you've got to go to Pittsburgh.
(20 years after playing Pittsburgh six times in two seasons) "Don't take long to spend all the time you want in Pittsburgh."
(referring to Miami Dolphins coach Don Shula) "He can take his'n and beat your'n and take your'n and beat his'n."
(referring to Houston Oilers quarterback Warren Moon) "That boy could throw a football through a car wash and not get it wet."
(when asked about Oilers RB Earl Campbell's inability to finish a one-mile run in training camp) "When it's first and a mile, I won't give it to him."
(when asked by Bob Costas why he took his wife on all of the Oilers' road trips) "Because she's too ugly to kiss goodbye." "Last year we knocked on the door. This year we beat on it. Next year we're going to kick the son of a bitch in." of Earl Campbell, "I don't know if he's in a class by himself, but whatever class he's in, it don't take long to call the roll." LINK
RIP Coach Oail Andrew "Bum" Phillips