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Started By
Message
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Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:02 am
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:02 am
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This post was edited on 11/10/23 at 5:12 am
12
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:03 am to DelU249
And we roll on. Endor Sucks.
So after Luke and his pals interrupt a serious mission briefing with light hearted one liners, hugging and being selfish pricks, We are introduced to the the main plot of this movie. Who is excited for trees? So after being treated to places like Yavin, the Death Star, Imperial Star Destroyers, Tattooine, Hoth, Degabah, and cloud city (bespin) we get a shitload of trees that any of us can go outside and see. Basically after going to tunisia and london, lucas was burned out. Kershner had to film on a glacier in Norway, but lucas wasn't involved at all in the production. Now he has a hand puppet director and he is pretty much running shite again. So you know there is no way he is going to tunisia again, when he can just shoot in northern california where he lives. Granted, I now appreciate even this. I mean he did get out of his chair.
Obi Wan sucks in this movie
Before Luke rudely interrupts the mission briefings, he returns to finish training with yoda. Ummm, I'm kind of over luke training at this point. He's supposed to be a fricking jedi at this point in the trilogy. oh good yoda dies in like 2 seconds and luke doesn't really seem all that bothered. Then obi wan shows up and Luke ain't even mad bra. Point of View? WTF Lucas, cant obi wan just say that he was afraid to tell luke before his training was over because he was afraid he either wouldn't face vader or would join him or something. Instead we get some bullshite about truth from a point of view making wise old obi wan sound like Bill Clinton explaining what "is" is. Now aside from Obi Wan's stupid haircut, everything in this scene is wrong. For one, why is ghost obi wan sitting down? Are his force bones hurting? The blocking sucks. Why isn't he standing up, mysteriously, lordly and briefly while luke is on his knees crying/panicing over yoda's death and the new found knowledge he has a sibling and must face his father.
Nope! I felt like these two probably just chit chatted seinfeld style for hours after the scene ends
Production Values. Where are they?
Without a doubt my favorite aspect, visually, when it comes to the star wars trilogy are the fantastic sets in Star Wars and Empire. The death Star sets, the hoth base sets, cloud city, degobah?? and others. Now this movie has one fantastic set in the throne room (its right up there with the carbon freeze chamber as my favorite in the series) but does anything come to mind after that? Ummm, I guess they showed us like one room in jabba's palace and then the same room on his barge. It seems like Lucas just went outside on his ranch and shot a star wars movie. Now even the special effects aren't any good. This is the one movie where I'm all in favor of specializing and "enhancing" the frick out of it because everything from the aliens to the rancor looks like shite
Ewoks
I hate ewoks, and I'll just assume that I don't need to explain the absurdity of a band of cuddly ill equiped creatures taking down an entire army of highly trained stormtroopers with speeders, walker and guns.
What happened to the Characters?
All of the characters, who were so fleshed out in empire, seem to have disappeared. Han's dialogue and arrogant attitude seem forced. I cringed watching the gags with him last night. He also looks like he gained 20 lbs and aged 10 years while frozen in carbonite, but thats a minor thing. WTF happened to leia. I always liked Leia. She was a feisty little sniz who possessed a worldly charm, now she's this really nice and sweet woman in love. Since when does falling in love mean you both have to act like fricking teenagers in a mall? god dammit the writing in this movie is awful. Han acts like a jealous 12 year old and then completely against character, just lays down and apologizes to leia, who he thinks is in love with luke. And speaking of romance
Lucas takes the easy way out of a tense and complicated love triangle
So it's pretty clear in the first two movies that there is a subtle but distinct love triangle. leia kisses luke twice. Han and Luke are jealous of one another. "do you think a girl like her and a guy like me could..." Luke cuts him off "NO"
How about we see Luke and Leia's dynamic has changed while han has been in carbonite and we experience this from his POV? There could be an undercurrent of tension between the 3 throughout the movie. Han dies, Leia is crushed at the end, but Luke knowing she chose han and he has a sibling or sister somewhere walks off like eastwood in search for his sister and on his long journey to rebuilding the jedi order. Thats 20x better and I don't even have an imagination and I'm no fricking screenwriter. But no, Leia is his sister, empire is awkward and the love triangle is resolved without any tension, passion or despair.
So after Luke and his pals interrupt a serious mission briefing with light hearted one liners, hugging and being selfish pricks, We are introduced to the the main plot of this movie. Who is excited for trees? So after being treated to places like Yavin, the Death Star, Imperial Star Destroyers, Tattooine, Hoth, Degabah, and cloud city (bespin) we get a shitload of trees that any of us can go outside and see. Basically after going to tunisia and london, lucas was burned out. Kershner had to film on a glacier in Norway, but lucas wasn't involved at all in the production. Now he has a hand puppet director and he is pretty much running shite again. So you know there is no way he is going to tunisia again, when he can just shoot in northern california where he lives. Granted, I now appreciate even this. I mean he did get out of his chair.
Obi Wan sucks in this movie
Before Luke rudely interrupts the mission briefings, he returns to finish training with yoda. Ummm, I'm kind of over luke training at this point. He's supposed to be a fricking jedi at this point in the trilogy. oh good yoda dies in like 2 seconds and luke doesn't really seem all that bothered. Then obi wan shows up and Luke ain't even mad bra. Point of View? WTF Lucas, cant obi wan just say that he was afraid to tell luke before his training was over because he was afraid he either wouldn't face vader or would join him or something. Instead we get some bullshite about truth from a point of view making wise old obi wan sound like Bill Clinton explaining what "is" is. Now aside from Obi Wan's stupid haircut, everything in this scene is wrong. For one, why is ghost obi wan sitting down? Are his force bones hurting? The blocking sucks. Why isn't he standing up, mysteriously, lordly and briefly while luke is on his knees crying/panicing over yoda's death and the new found knowledge he has a sibling and must face his father.
Nope! I felt like these two probably just chit chatted seinfeld style for hours after the scene ends
Production Values. Where are they?
Without a doubt my favorite aspect, visually, when it comes to the star wars trilogy are the fantastic sets in Star Wars and Empire. The death Star sets, the hoth base sets, cloud city, degobah?? and others. Now this movie has one fantastic set in the throne room (its right up there with the carbon freeze chamber as my favorite in the series) but does anything come to mind after that? Ummm, I guess they showed us like one room in jabba's palace and then the same room on his barge. It seems like Lucas just went outside on his ranch and shot a star wars movie. Now even the special effects aren't any good. This is the one movie where I'm all in favor of specializing and "enhancing" the frick out of it because everything from the aliens to the rancor looks like shite
Ewoks
I hate ewoks, and I'll just assume that I don't need to explain the absurdity of a band of cuddly ill equiped creatures taking down an entire army of highly trained stormtroopers with speeders, walker and guns.
What happened to the Characters?
All of the characters, who were so fleshed out in empire, seem to have disappeared. Han's dialogue and arrogant attitude seem forced. I cringed watching the gags with him last night. He also looks like he gained 20 lbs and aged 10 years while frozen in carbonite, but thats a minor thing. WTF happened to leia. I always liked Leia. She was a feisty little sniz who possessed a worldly charm, now she's this really nice and sweet woman in love. Since when does falling in love mean you both have to act like fricking teenagers in a mall? god dammit the writing in this movie is awful. Han acts like a jealous 12 year old and then completely against character, just lays down and apologizes to leia, who he thinks is in love with luke. And speaking of romance
Lucas takes the easy way out of a tense and complicated love triangle
So it's pretty clear in the first two movies that there is a subtle but distinct love triangle. leia kisses luke twice. Han and Luke are jealous of one another. "do you think a girl like her and a guy like me could..." Luke cuts him off "NO"
How about we see Luke and Leia's dynamic has changed while han has been in carbonite and we experience this from his POV? There could be an undercurrent of tension between the 3 throughout the movie. Han dies, Leia is crushed at the end, but Luke knowing she chose han and he has a sibling or sister somewhere walks off like eastwood in search for his sister and on his long journey to rebuilding the jedi order. Thats 20x better and I don't even have an imagination and I'm no fricking screenwriter. But no, Leia is his sister, empire is awkward and the love triangle is resolved without any tension, passion or despair.
This post was edited on 3/5/13 at 3:09 pm
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:03 am to DelU249
The music sucks
Star Wars...Star Wars theme
Empire...Imperial March
Jedi...Yub Nub
Emperor Palpatine
Palpatine steals the show, and the scenes with him are enthralling. He doesn't really tempt luke with anything, but god damn he is such a good character and Ian Mcdyrmidskdf;lsdkfj does a great job of portryaing the character.
Droids
Why in gods name does han, leia and luke bring r2 and c3po to endor. In star wars they're unintentionally along for the ride and they serve a purpose. In empire, once again they're possessions that are packed up when escaping hoth. Kershner finds some pretty good ways to make them accessible to us and humanize them. He makes them useful but not in a cheap way. But in Jedi, they're just there, doing stupid things and the plot seems as if it was written to accomodate them.
Vader Doesn't Kill Anyone
So at this point in 1983, vader is really popular. Lucas realizing this, has to make him a good guy because everyone who is popular must be a babyface. It's almost like professional wrestling. After two movies of being an awful, murderous henchman, he now is transformed into some sort of tragedy and the emperor takes his place as the purely evil character. Why cant they both just be two really evil dudes? To make his redemption more believable Lucas doesn't have him kill or hurt anyone (other than the emperor) You just know watching the opening scene that moff jerjerkjdlsdfjlk is hurting for a choking. I wasn't really surprised to find out that a scene of vader choking moff jerjerklsdj; was cut from the movie. At least they delayed introducing him as the chosen one and allowing the trilogy to end on a somewhat respectable note.
So I've pretty much said everything I wanted to say about this
I remember this movie as ok. I was looking forward to watching it last night, but I was really taken aback at how awful everything minus the emperor scenes were. It's almost like a satire of Star Wars instead of the satisfying conclusion to a great saga. There is alot that could be said about costumes and makeup, but it really doesn't matter at this point. I'll just end with the last inconsistency. Vader dies, but his body does not transform into a luminous being that is one with the force, but at the end we see his force ghost chilling with obi wan and yoda. You'd also think this reunion might be a little awkward. After all, he did kill children, murder tons of people and help bring about an evil empire that enslaved the galaxy. In summation, frick you george lucas.
and because it either has been said or will be said, I think this movie is light years better than the prequels, but falls drastically short of the standards set by the original movie and the Empire Strikes Back
Star Wars...Star Wars theme
Empire...Imperial March
Jedi...Yub Nub
Emperor Palpatine
Palpatine steals the show, and the scenes with him are enthralling. He doesn't really tempt luke with anything, but god damn he is such a good character and Ian Mcdyrmidskdf;lsdkfj does a great job of portryaing the character.
Droids
Why in gods name does han, leia and luke bring r2 and c3po to endor. In star wars they're unintentionally along for the ride and they serve a purpose. In empire, once again they're possessions that are packed up when escaping hoth. Kershner finds some pretty good ways to make them accessible to us and humanize them. He makes them useful but not in a cheap way. But in Jedi, they're just there, doing stupid things and the plot seems as if it was written to accomodate them.
Vader Doesn't Kill Anyone
So at this point in 1983, vader is really popular. Lucas realizing this, has to make him a good guy because everyone who is popular must be a babyface. It's almost like professional wrestling. After two movies of being an awful, murderous henchman, he now is transformed into some sort of tragedy and the emperor takes his place as the purely evil character. Why cant they both just be two really evil dudes? To make his redemption more believable Lucas doesn't have him kill or hurt anyone (other than the emperor) You just know watching the opening scene that moff jerjerkjdlsdfjlk is hurting for a choking. I wasn't really surprised to find out that a scene of vader choking moff jerjerklsdj; was cut from the movie. At least they delayed introducing him as the chosen one and allowing the trilogy to end on a somewhat respectable note.
So I've pretty much said everything I wanted to say about this
I remember this movie as ok. I was looking forward to watching it last night, but I was really taken aback at how awful everything minus the emperor scenes were. It's almost like a satire of Star Wars instead of the satisfying conclusion to a great saga. There is alot that could be said about costumes and makeup, but it really doesn't matter at this point. I'll just end with the last inconsistency. Vader dies, but his body does not transform into a luminous being that is one with the force, but at the end we see his force ghost chilling with obi wan and yoda. You'd also think this reunion might be a little awkward. After all, he did kill children, murder tons of people and help bring about an evil empire that enslaved the galaxy. In summation, frick you george lucas.
and because it either has been said or will be said, I think this movie is light years better than the prequels, but falls drastically short of the standards set by the original movie and the Empire Strikes Back
This post was edited on 3/5/13 at 3:13 pm
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:03 am to DelU249
reserved
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:04 am to DelU249
quote:
Return of the Jedi is a pretty sub par movie.
Quit reading.
ETA: Deleted scene was great and should have made the film.
This post was edited on 3/5/13 at 10:12 am
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:07 am to McRebel42
quote:
Quit reading.
He's right
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:08 am to DelU249
tl;dr
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:09 am to McRebel42
Is this the Red Letter Review? Maybe I'm just reading it in that voice.
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:09 am to DelU249
Why didn't the Death Star just blow away Yavin and therefore the rebel base on Yavin 4?
Seriously how do 4 people and 2 droids evade 100k storm troopers in a fortress?
How does the Falcon travel through space without a hyperdrive?
How does Vadar get a dozen bounty hunters to show up in less than 30 minutes?
Star Wars and Empire suck. ALOT.
Seriously how do 4 people and 2 droids evade 100k storm troopers in a fortress?
How does the Falcon travel through space without a hyperdrive?
How does Vadar get a dozen bounty hunters to show up in less than 30 minutes?
Star Wars and Empire suck. ALOT.
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:11 am to alajones
quote:
Star Wars and Empire suck. ALOT.
Shut your whore mouth.
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:14 am to alajones
quote:
Why didn't the Death Star just blow away Yavin and therefore the rebel base on Yavin 4?
Seriously how do 4 people and 2 droids evade 100k storm troopers in a fortress?
How does the Falcon travel through space without a hyperdrive?
How does Vadar get a dozen bounty hunters to show up in less than 30 minutes?
The first one you have a point, but the others are just plain nitpicky.
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:17 am to OMLandshark
@alajones
IT'S A MOVIE ... and a sci-fi one at that ... that was made in the 70's.
Imagine if it was made today by a great director ... UNfrickING BELIEVABLE IT WOULD BE.
IT'S A MOVIE ... and a sci-fi one at that ... that was made in the 70's.
Imagine if it was made today by a great director ... UNfrickING BELIEVABLE IT WOULD BE.
This post was edited on 3/5/13 at 10:18 am
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:31 am to DelU249
This is an obsession of yours, isn't it? Sorry, but you'll always be in the minority. You're wrong and your post is wrong. Your future posts will be wrong.
And yeah, tl;dr
And yeah, tl;dr
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:37 am to blueboy
actually i enjoyed this movie every time as a kid, now it just kind of sucks. I haven't seen it in 10 years until last night. I found myself wanting to shut it off or skip to the throne room scenes.
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:41 am to OMLandshark
quote:
The first one you have a point, but the others are just plain nitpicky.
Like the OP
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:42 am to McRebel42
Oh my god you are all serious with this? Do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign?
I even made fun of his spelling.
I even made fun of his spelling.
This post was edited on 3/5/13 at 10:44 am
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:42 am to DelU249
With Return of the Jedi, Lucas was not interested in making something along the lines of Empire Strikes back. This at the time, was the last film ever in the Star Wars universe. So basically he wanted to make sure he can cash in his cash cow.
There was also too many other things going on behind the scenes. Like a ton of scrip rewrites, and Lucas trying to prove that he could direct and make a more epic picture without the help of some of the ppl from Empire. The same thing he did with the prequels. Try to prove that he was a better director and story teller. Had they not messed with the original script idea, and given the reigns over to someone else. Jedi would have been ended up much different as a result.
There was also too many other things going on behind the scenes. Like a ton of scrip rewrites, and Lucas trying to prove that he could direct and make a more epic picture without the help of some of the ppl from Empire. The same thing he did with the prequels. Try to prove that he was a better director and story teller. Had they not messed with the original script idea, and given the reigns over to someone else. Jedi would have been ended up much different as a result.
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:49 am to DelU249
quote:Legitimate.
Obi Wan sucks in this movie
Before Luke rudely interrupts the mission briefings, he returns to finish training with yoda. Ummm, I'm kind of over luke training at this point. He's supposed to be a fricking jedi at this point in the trilogy. oh good yoda dies in like 2 seconds and luke doesn't really seem all that bothered. Then obi wan shows up and Luke ain't even mad bra. Point of View? WTF Lucas, cant obi wan just say that he was afraid to tell luke before his training was over because he was afraid he either wouldn't face vader or would join him or something. Instead we get some bullshite about truth from a point of view making wise old obi wan sound like Bill Clinton explaining what "is" is. Now aside from Obi Wan's stupid haircut, everything in this scene is wrong. For one, why is ghost obi wan sitting down? Are his force bones hurting? The blocking sucks. Why isn't he standing up, mysteriously, lordly and briefly while luke is on his knees crying/panicing over yoda's death and the new found knowledge he has a sibling and must face his father. Nope! I felt like these two probably just chit chatted seinfeld style for hours after the scene ends
quote:Also true. The scenes in Jaba's palace and espescially inside th ebarge are clausterphopic.
Production Values. Where are they?
Without a doubt my favorite aspect, visually, when it comes to the star wars trilogy are the fantastic sets in Star Wars and Empire. The death Star sets, the hoth base sets, cloud city, degobah?? and others. Now this movie has one fantastic set in the throne room (its right up there with the carbon freeze chamber as my favorite in the series) but does anything come to mind after that? Ummm, I guess they showed us like one room in jabba's palace and then the same room on his barge. It seems like Lucas just went outside on his ranch and shot a star wars movie. Now even the special effects aren't any good. This is the one movie where I'm all in favor of specializing and "enhancing" the frick out of it because everything from the aliens to the rancor looks like shite
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:53 am to RonBurgundy
quote:
Is this the Red Letter Review?
you can go back and do a RLR-type analysis of the original 3 movies and destroy them
not as bad as the prequels, but you can still destroy them
these movies are sci fi operas for children. they are a part of childhood memories/love. they're not awesome movies (even ESB)
Posted on 3/5/13 at 10:54 am to DelU249
quote:
Now aside from Obi Wan's stupid haircut
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