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Wife and I are thinking about adopting
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:44 pm
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:44 pm
We have a 10 year old son and he is a handful like most 10 year olds. We thought about having a second child years ago, but decided against it. We have entertained the idea of adopting an older child in the age range of 6-10. I really don't want to go through the 0-2 years with a child at this point, so adoption seems like a good course. I've just started reading up on it. Of course we're at the very initial stages of even thinking seriously about it.
Just wondering if any of you guys have any horror stories or, hopefully, great successes of adoption.
Have any of you adopted children? I went to adoptUSAkids.org and searched my state for kids. It seems most of them have behavior and school issues, which I can assume is associated with the situation they're in. Heck, most kids have these same issues. But probably a bit more pronounced in these kids. I think it would be very cool to give a kid a good home and family.
Just wondering if any of you guys have any horror stories or, hopefully, great successes of adoption.
Have any of you adopted children? I went to adoptUSAkids.org and searched my state for kids. It seems most of them have behavior and school issues, which I can assume is associated with the situation they're in. Heck, most kids have these same issues. But probably a bit more pronounced in these kids. I think it would be very cool to give a kid a good home and family.
This post was edited on 2/26/14 at 1:46 pm
26
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:45 pm to i am dan
quote:
I went to adoptUSAkids.org
How about foreign-born?
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:46 pm to i am dan
go to asia and adopt a chinaman
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:46 pm to LSU Piston
Hope I don't catch hell for this, but we would like to adopt an American caucasian child.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:47 pm to i am dan
Man, I wouldn't want to deal with adopting a kid I couldn't mold that was between 6-10. Would be like getting a rescue puppy where there could be all sorts of underlying psychological issues that you will never, NEVER be able to fix.
Go with the infant and give a kid a chance. Its too late for the older ones.
ETA: Don't fool yourself into believing you can fix them. You can't.
Go with the infant and give a kid a chance. Its too late for the older ones.
ETA: Don't fool yourself into believing you can fix them. You can't.
This post was edited on 2/26/14 at 1:49 pm
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:47 pm to i am dan
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:47 pm to i am dan
All I know is it's best to get them as young as possible. A lot come from some bad situations. The less they remember, the more you can mold them into respectable members of society. 
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:48 pm to Sterling Archer
quote:
All I know is it's best to get them as young as possible. A lot come from some bad situations. The less they remember, the more you can mold them into respectable members of society.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:48 pm to i am dan
The younger the easier.
But... I know a family who adopted three.
The oldest asked to return to her mother, and did.
If you can give a child a good life, it's about the greatest gift you can give.
But... I know a family who adopted three.
The oldest asked to return to her mother, and did.
If you can give a child a good life, it's about the greatest gift you can give.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:49 pm to LSU Piston
quote:
How about foreign-born?
Why!?! PLENTY of kids in the US system without going off to Timbuktu so you can play Angelina Jolie and pick out Mfufu.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:49 pm to i am dan
Back when I dated Angelina Jolie, all she talked about was adopting an African...that's why I broke up with her
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:50 pm to i am dan
quote:
Hope I don't catch hell for this, but we would like to adopt an American caucasian child.
Why? Just wondering.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:50 pm to Teddy Ruxpin
quote:
Go with the infant and give a kid a chance. Its too late for the older ones.
I was thinking the same thing, but I hope there would be something my wife and I could do to give the child every chance in "fixing" whatever is going wrong with him.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:50 pm to LSUsmartass
quote:
go to asia and adopt a chinaman
Strange but my wife and I were just talking about this at lunch today.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:50 pm to i am dan
Have you considered being a foster parent? I've heard that is one way to adopt...is to foster the child first.
When you go that route it is much less expensive and the state usually pays for most of your adoption fees(from what I've been told).
When you go that route it is much less expensive and the state usually pays for most of your adoption fees(from what I've been told).
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:50 pm to i am dan
I'd imagine a kid that was put up for adoption at 8 will be pretty fricked in the head
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:51 pm to i am dan
quote:unfortunately for you, you'll soon find that those are in high demand
Hope I don't catch hell for this, but we would like to adopt an American caucasian child.
why are you wanting to adopt?
because you want another child but it's not physically possible? or because you want to give a child a good home and change their lives. If it's the latter I'd think long and hard about not narrowing what "color" child I would accept into my home
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:51 pm to i am dan
My wife & I adopted a 9 year old boy (10 yrs ago). Pretty much all kids coming out of foster homes, etc have "issues" or baggage but don't we all? Finding a kid in at age group will be a breeze. Contact your state's DCS (Dept of Child Services) or whatever your state calls it so you can adopt a "local" kid. I can't image not adopting him again if I had to do it over. In Florida the process is very easy and almost free (cost a total of $5 and that was for the finger printing to do the background check). Also the DCS have "viewings" where they take a bunch of the kids to park and prospective parents can "view" the kids to see which ones they want (I know that sounds shitty but how else could you find out). During the process you'll get the complete case study so there won't be any surprises. Good luck!
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:51 pm to i am dan
quote:
Why? Just wondering.
Just less friction in life. I have nothing but respect for people who adopt outside their race, but it's not something I'm prepared to deal with.
Posted on 2/26/14 at 1:52 pm to Wtodd
Just to keep it tight I see...
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