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Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:19 pm to Hangit
quote:
And the parrot says "Africa".
love that joke..and this one
quote:
So Sister Theresa says "I want to gargle with the water before Sister Mary Katherine sits in it".
Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:21 pm to TheJunction
Man sees a beautiful woman at the bar and approaches her.
"Hey beautiful, what's your name?"
"Hi, my name is Carmen, nice to meet you"
"Carmen huh? That's a pretty name. Where'd that come from?"
" well, I hated my birth name, so when I turned 18 I took my 2 favorite things, cars and men, and combined them to get Carmen. By the way, I didn't catch your name"
"Beerfrick"
"Hey beautiful, what's your name?"
"Hi, my name is Carmen, nice to meet you"
"Carmen huh? That's a pretty name. Where'd that come from?"
" well, I hated my birth name, so when I turned 18 I took my 2 favorite things, cars and men, and combined them to get Carmen. By the way, I didn't catch your name"
"Beerfrick"
Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:26 pm to Hangit
quote:
How about a few old punch lines?
No, no, no, it's just ice cream.
"See, that's how you fan her"
"Bald Eagle"
This post was edited on 5/30/15 at 8:45 pm
Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:31 pm to LSUsuperfresh
quote:
An atheist, a crossfitter, and a vegan are all sitting at a bar...
...And I only know this because they won't shut the hell up about it.
I never get this insult about atheists. I am no atheist, but I see Jesus billboards everywhere, church live on TV on several channels, God and Jesus bumper stickers, religious shite all over facebook and instagram, people knocking on my door to spread the word of their religion, and gaudy crosses tattooed all over people or hanging around their necks.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:36 pm to TheCaterpillar
How can you tell if someone is from Texas?
Don't worry, they will tell you.
Don't worry, they will tell you.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:39 pm to TheJunction
Why did they cancel the leper ice hockey league?
There was a face off in the corner.
There was a face off in the corner.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 12:52 pm to TheJunction
I like my women the way I like my scotch.
12 years old with coke.
12 years old with coke.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 1:08 pm to logjamming
A 90 year old man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor asks him, "What's wrong?" The old man says, "I can't pee." The doctor then asks "How old are you?" The man says, "I'm 90." The doctor says, "You've peed enough."
Posted on 5/30/15 at 1:44 pm to Thib-a-doe Tiger
quote:
quote:
How about a few old punch lines?
But this one is eating my popcorn
Posted on 5/30/15 at 2:14 pm to rantfan
I guess politically incorrect jokes are out.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 2:15 pm to TheJunction
Do you know how a Livingston Parish mom knows when her daughter is on her period?
Her son's dick tastes funny.
Her son's dick tastes funny.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 2:29 pm to wallowinit
Whats brown and sticky?
a stick
a stick
Posted on 5/30/15 at 2:46 pm to logjamming
quote:
I like my women the way I like my scotch.
12 years old with coke.
Screw the pedophilia, you should be put in jail for mixing 12 year old scotch with coke.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 2:48 pm to TheCaterpillar
quote:
Screw the pedophilia, you should be put in jail for mixing 12 year old scotch with coke.
........missed it by juuuuuuuuuuust a little bit.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 3:06 pm to TheJunction
Whats soft and brown and found in little boys underpants? Michael Jacksons hand
Did you hear that McDonalds released the McJackson Burger? Its a 50yr old piece of meat between 10yr old buns
How do you blind a Chinaman? Put a windshield in front of them
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead
Did you hear that McDonalds released the McJackson Burger? Its a 50yr old piece of meat between 10yr old buns
How do you blind a Chinaman? Put a windshield in front of them
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead
Posted on 5/30/15 at 3:12 pm to Genghis Khan
What's the difference between a microwave and anal sex?
A microwave won't brown your meat
A microwave won't brown your meat
Posted on 5/30/15 at 3:37 pm to bnh
Why did the pervert cross the road?
To keep his dick in the chicken.
To keep his dick in the chicken.
Posted on 5/30/15 at 3:49 pm to Hangit
quote:
How about a few old punch lines?
David Duke , see ya Tuesday ....
Posted on 5/30/15 at 4:15 pm to bnh
(no message)
This post was edited on 5/31/15 at 7:23 am
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