Best excuse you've given for canceling an appointment?

I had a limb fall on a power line in my backyard last year and catch fire. That was pretty convenient.

Had my tires slashed by a crazy bitch. I didn't realize how trashy it sounded until after I told it to my boss..

Ants.

For some odd reason, my car got infested with ants overnight years ago. I had to spray my car interior with bug killer, vacuum those lil suckers out and give it at least 24 hours to let them all die from the poison.

always have to work for some idiot, but if I had to make one up. Sick, throwing up

Having projectile vomiting is a good one but saying you have projectile diarrhea is even better. Most people will not want to question you for details on that and certainly no one wants you to come to work for fear it is contagious.

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Having projectile vomiting is a good one but saying you have projectile diarrhea is even better. Most people will not want to question you for details on that and certainly no one wants you to come to work for fear it is contagious.

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The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom; I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh... you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school.

I have had to cancel numerous dentist appointments because of traveling for work. I do not have a Delorean and cannot tell if I will be in town 6 months into the future. I used some doozies when too hungover to go to work back when I was in college.

Mom's cancer

Mom's funeral.

In that order.