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re: Any married guys had an affair?
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:00 pm to tiggerthetooth
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:00 pm to tiggerthetooth
Eh, the blanket statement that all cheating is bad is just wrong. Don't get me wrong, most cheating is bad -- but there are definitely circumstances where cheating may make sense (e.g. avoiding divorce rape and you're in a shitty marriage).
1
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:01 pm to tiggerthetooth
quote:
Those people sound bored with life and incapable of finding other things to motivate them.
That tends to happen to everyone sometime in their adult life.
quote:
I think there's a lot of people that get married, get the job, get the kids, and then everything else is just a side to that because really that's all they ever wanted (marriage,kids, family etc.). After awhile it gets boring and since they never thought about life much outside of the classic marriage and never learned to value anything outside of it they wander down bad paths.
Or, people change. In a marriage it's likely both people. You either adjust to it, or not.
You can justify anything if you really want to. Every case I'm aware of, the blame was always on the other person. The line between darkness and illumination is extremely thin and lots of folks spend time wondering from one to the other.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:05 pm to TheOcean
quote:
Eh, the blanket statement that all cheating is bad is just wrong.
quote:
(e.g. avoiding divorce rape and you're in a shitty marriage).
Yeah if you have bad judgement with regard to who you marry.
Cheating is bad because it means either you can't keep a commitment, thus hurting others, or you made a bad decision to be in that marriage in the first place by not considering if you were truly compatible with that person.
Cheating is in either case a symptom of your bad judgement. No way around it.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:06 pm to tiggerthetooth
quote:
Yeah if you have bad judgement with regard to who you marry.
If only it was that simple. You can't pidgeonhole everyone into that bullshite line of thinking. Come on, man -- think critically. Relationships change, people change.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:06 pm to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
That tends to happen to everyone sometime in their adult life.
I don't believe that's true. Maybe the classic western adult life where that period of time essentially becomes about earning more money and saving for retirement while raising kids.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:11 pm to tiggerthetooth
Who left, the wife or the GF?
First the GF left me for the rich older guy. I couldn't hide my devastation from the wife. Ended up confessing. The 40 lbs left in the following 6 weeks. Trauma Trim.
First the GF left me for the rich older guy. I couldn't hide my devastation from the wife. Ended up confessing. The 40 lbs left in the following 6 weeks. Trauma Trim.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:25 pm to TheOcean
quote:
If only it was that simple. You can't pidgeonhole everyone into that bullshite line of thinking. Come on, man -- think critically. Relationships change, people change.
They change, sure, but who doesn't expect that? Just because they change the marriage should end?
I mean, you have obviously supported this line of thinking and adopted it.
I know of many quality marriages that are happy and have lasted long.
They don't enter into the marriage with cop out attitudes and conduct themselves appropriately during the marriage.
Is marriage glamorous all the time? No. I think a lot of people are shortsighted and only see the glamorous aspects of marriage and then low and behold, "well, I'm just different now! People change". No shite, you didnt know that before marriage? You prepare yourself for the change. Work harder at the relationship develop depth.
Stop living your lives like Tv families.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:35 pm to Rex Feral
I've said it before, I'll say it again. When I met my wife, I was 21. I was friends with 12 women or so. I had gone out with a few of them. A few of us had slept together.
I was the glue holding their chaos together.
Two days after I met my wife, I pushed them all away.
Not because I'm some Romeo capable of seducing women at will, but because whiskey drinking Rando makes up for an utter lack of morals with an unregulated suaveness.
I love my wife and wouldn't touch another woman.
If she were to leave me, I do have my first four fricks planned out.
I was the glue holding their chaos together.
Two days after I met my wife, I pushed them all away.
Not because I'm some Romeo capable of seducing women at will, but because whiskey drinking Rando makes up for an utter lack of morals with an unregulated suaveness.
I love my wife and wouldn't touch another woman.
If she were to leave me, I do have my first four fricks planned out.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 2:37 pm to PortHudsonPlaya
quote:
She was on vacation both times. It wasn't like it was an ongoing affair with feelings involved. I'm not insecure like most tho. Forgive and forget.
Perhaps she should nix the girls vacations from here on out.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 3:09 pm to Rex Feral
Nope. I got too much pride and love my wife 100% unconditionally. For those who do cheat, you better hope you don't bring home a disease and get your wife infected. Cheaters are punks. It's never right even if you are separated.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 3:13 pm to Rex Feral
(no message)
This post was edited on 11/12/17 at 12:20 pm
Posted on 9/30/17 at 3:18 pm to PortHudsonPlaya
quote:
She was on vacation both times. It wasn't like it was an ongoing affair with feelings involved. I'm not insecure like most tho. Forgive and forget.
Right, just like a muscle spasm, huh?
Okay captain clueless. You've probably never seen good marriages and think you've somehow got it good.
You've got issues if you tolerate that shite. I bet she needs you to pay shite, or just likes you for the kids.
This post was edited on 9/30/17 at 3:19 pm
Posted on 9/30/17 at 3:21 pm to PortHudsonPlaya
She should have just taken that shite to the grave...or did you catch her somehow? If she fessed up and asked for forgiveness that's weak.
The second time? Wow, you're a forgiving dude.
My wife's hot AF and cool and I know I'd have difficulty matching her with another mate...but damn if I'm big enough to stick around after number 2. My wife would take that shite to the grave though, she's steely.
If one of her friends told me and she verified I'd probably rent a place for six months and see if being apart made me want her more or less. Second time...I'd never frick her again.
I've never cheated, 15 yrs, no idea if she has or not.
The second time? Wow, you're a forgiving dude.
My wife's hot AF and cool and I know I'd have difficulty matching her with another mate...but damn if I'm big enough to stick around after number 2. My wife would take that shite to the grave though, she's steely.
If one of her friends told me and she verified I'd probably rent a place for six months and see if being apart made me want her more or less. Second time...I'd never frick her again.
I've never cheated, 15 yrs, no idea if she has or not.
This post was edited on 9/30/17 at 3:24 pm
Posted on 9/30/17 at 4:13 pm to PortHudsonPlaya
That's my story. How did you move on? I'm miserable. Wife cheated on me. Total mistake, but I can't move on. We have a great relationship and four boys . I don't want to mess up what we have, but an opportunity has presented itself and I'm torn. Rational me says no, emotional me says let's even the score. I'm dying here.
This post was edited on 9/30/17 at 4:23 pm
Posted on 9/30/17 at 4:19 pm to Rex Feral
frick no, that shows no will power. frick that.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 4:21 pm to X123F45
quote:Rando is Scruffy, Scruffy is Rondo....
but because whiskey drinking Rando makes up for an utter lack of morals with an unregulated suaveness.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 4:40 pm to Rex Feral
If she cheated once, she is/will cheat again
Posted on 9/30/17 at 5:02 pm to UncleRuckus
So what's my move?
Posted on 9/30/17 at 5:03 pm to Gaston
quote:
I've never cheated, 15 yrs, no idea if she has or not.
This is strange. Do you and your wife not share things? If a married couple is doing it right, they won’t be able to hide cheating because they are so open with each other, and it would immediately become obvious when one closed off.
Posted on 9/30/17 at 5:12 pm to PortHudsonPlaya
PORTHUDSONPLAYA
Dude she's taking anal from guys on vacation. How the you accept the fact it happens TWICE? I hope you don't work 7-12s because one of your buddies is tearing that shite up but he's not doing a good job if she's getting it in on vacation. What kind of girl friends let her habitually leave the group and get railed by some random guy?
Dude she's taking anal from guys on vacation. How the you accept the fact it happens TWICE? I hope you don't work 7-12s because one of your buddies is tearing that shite up but he's not doing a good job if she's getting it in on vacation. What kind of girl friends let her habitually leave the group and get railed by some random guy?
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