How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside) | TigerDroppings.com

Posted byMessage
I Love Bama
Alabama Fan
Alabama
Member since Nov 2007
32069 posts

How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


Some lurker from Tennessee posted this up in 2011 and I thought it was spot on. One of the very few threads from this cesspool that helped me IRL. Some of you young players need to read up on it.

Today, I'm feeling altruistic and I am going to let the young men here in on a few of the lesser known secrets of that crazy species we call women. There are many mysteries of the universe, vast unknowable chasms of wonder out there, but the gals are not one of them. They are not like us, but they are not without a purpose or a plan and I happen to know most of it. I have stayed at many a Holiday Inn Express, and I have had my 31 flavors of pie.

So, if you are between the ages of 15 and 25, or mentally so, pay attention and tattoo these pearls on the inside of your thigh. When you have lived a long and failed life of disasterous encounters with the fairer sex, you will want to read back my little laundry list and slap yourself for not taking it to heart.

Item 1: Do not listen to what women have to say about women. They are not privy to the keen powers of self-instropection, nor are they honest when the mirror paints the picture of womanhood in a less-than-flattering light. If women were to be trusted about how they tick, we'd all have it figured out, and women would be happy. Society is afraid of saying what I am, that women have been led to believe they are a noble half of the human race, and more suited to matters of the heart. Fact is, they're just as clueless as you. Next.

Item 2: Women are 95% a product of the relationship (or lack thereof) between they and their fathers. Men are made by their mothers, women by their dads. If daddy beat them, left them, or otherwise was a shitbag, you had better believe they will not have healthy impulses and chaos will follow them throughout their days. This is an absolute, so trust me when I say, if they don't have a healthy relationship with pops, they're not having one with you either, so fricking run. Yes, they're going to be fun in the sackeroo, but trust me....run. That other 5% of their nature comes from lucky genetics, but you're not turning that into anything by yourself. You ain't fixing a broken girl, so just run.

Item 3: To attract women, you need but one thing....to be in charge. Not necessarily of the world or the building you work in, but in charge of your surroundings. You need to be in charge of whatever setting you and the women will be in. In any herd of animals, the females obey the alpha. You must be, no matter what the situation, the "guy". You might need to be the funny guy, or the cool guy, or the host, or the entertainer, or even the "taken" one, but you had better be the center of attention that day. To be this thing, you need some confidence, you need your shite in order, and you need some sort of talent that will put you in the alpha spot - no matter if that's at the library or at the night club. Women do not fawn at the slowest, weakest gazelle. They look at what's running out front, and follow. Get your life in order. Women are not laying in the tub right now letting the water hit the pink parts dreaming about a gun nut who's playing Rainbow Six in his mom's basement. You follow? This leads me to item 4.

Item 4: Women, real women, do not want a boy. They want a man, so be one. Don't get dickhead haircuts, tribal tats, spinners for your ghey car, the latest trendy clothes or skin care products. These are the tools of vain boys, and a woman does not want these things from you even if she acts like she does. You may get some dates, you may get laid, you may even get married by being a boy.....but bet your arse that your woman will dream of a man (which is not you).

Item 5: There is nothing a woman can sniff out like desperation. If you have even one tiny cell of creepy in you, she'll smell it all over you like a possum carcus in the sun. One of the lessons of adulthood is frickING RELAX. Do it, for all our sakes. Don't chase women, for there is no need. Be a man, be yourself, have a good time and get your life in order, and the women will forever come to you. Believe this fellas.....nothing could be truer. If young swingset would have only known this.... but that's another story and it involves copious masturbation and alot of Boone's Farm.

Item 6: Women, contrary to another urban legend, are shitbags too. They will have you convinced, if you talk to them enough, that they are the masters of reason and emotion. bullshite, fellas. They are contriving, maniacal masters of chaos and work feverishly against their own happiness sometimes. Nothing will disturb a woman so deeply to her core as true contentment. Some women shudder at the thought of a placid, pleasing life. It's a very rare thing, a woman at peace and comfortable with herself....so when you find one, say "I do" and keep her away from other women. Wanna see proof of this? Work along side alot of women. When one finds happiness, the others go about dismantling hers with ant-like industry. Nothing on earth is quite so destructive as women screwing with a happy one. It's a pretty safe bet that if your lady friends hang out with other girls, they will try (even unwittingly), to frick you up. Sorry girls, you know this one is true.

Item 7: Get to know your prospective inlaws....even if you have no idea you're going to marry the girl you're banging. If you don't love them like they're your own parents, RUN. Seriously, it's that simple. Run. Look at their relationship - her mother and father's. Look at it hard, because that's you in 25 years....or some variation of it. Your woman will make sure of it, because she's hard wired to.

Item 8: A woman's beauty is her worst enemy, and her only true servant. Be very afraid of a woman who has relied, or counted on her looks to survive or succeed - for when those looks or your attention to them wanes, she will self-destruct before your eyes. You will come home to find her gone, or on top of your best friend. Again, not to drive a point too fine, but stay away from the 10's. A stripper model does not live to enjoy a 50 year wedding anniversary, and she will not change your diapers when you're old. Believe it or not, that stuff really matters. You, like women, are driven by your nature. If you're always attracted to the worst kind of women, it's not their fault bucko. It's yours....so fight your impulses and go with what's smart not what "feels good".

Item 9: Lastly, I leave you with this. It's a difficult lesson to be a man. It's a painful, self-sacrificing labor and part of the human condition to be a man. You must accept that much of your life and your ties to women rely on your honor and your good nature. Sadly, most of us choose our mates based on nothing more than a tiny dab of sexual experience and a lot of ignorance about human nature. The women you meet, fall in love with, screw, and hurt, are all human beings with complex pasts, desires and dreams. Treat each woman, no matter who she is, as if she is your best friend's girl. Give her respect, even if you don't choose to engage her in a meaningful way. Understand that she is a daughter, a sister and someone's baby and if she's not good enough to be kind to, then leave her alone. Your dealings with the chicks will come back to haunt you, and each shitty act will be revisited on you, or your children, or your future women. Trust me here...it really happens. Be a good man, a smart man and an observant man, and women will not be a source of pain in your life. Take my word on it.



LINK - original thread



This post was edited on 6/27 at 10:51 am



Back to top
Share:
SuperSaint
UNO Fan
Member since Sep 2007
75168 posts
 Online 

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


I remember this thread. Damn good advice





Back to top
  Replies (0)
Topwater Trout
LSU Fan
Red Stick
Member since Oct 2010
35519 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

How to deal with women



quote:

I Love Bama








Back to top
  Replies (0)
Bluefin
South Carolina Fan
The Banana Stand
Member since Apr 2011
3194 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

One of the very few threads from this cesspool that helped me IRL.

Mine would be the no fap thread. I tried it, and I can actually see colors and have feelings now.






Back to top
  Replies (0)
TH03
Notre Dame Fan
In Darth's Head
Member since Dec 2008
92635 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

Item 2: Women are 95% a product of the relationship (or lack thereof) between they and their fathers. Men are made by their mothers, women by their dads. If daddy beat them, left them, or otherwise was a shitbag, you had better believe they will not have healthy impulses and chaos will follow them throughout their days. This is an absolute, so trust me when I say, if they don't have a healthy relationship with pops, they're not having one with you either, so fricking run. Yes, they're going to be fun in the sackeroo, but trust me....run. That other 5% of their nature comes from lucky genetics, but you're not turning that into anything by yourself. You ain't fixing a broken girl, so just run.


but when I say this, I'm just sexist






Back to top
I Love Bama
Alabama Fan
Alabama
Member since Nov 2007
32069 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


Thought about you last night when I saw Marissa Miller on TV. The original OT hottie. What did you think about her?





Back to top
tgrbaitn08
USA Fan
Member since Dec 2007
36725 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

Marissa Miller


butter face






Back to top
  Replies (0)
TH03
Notre Dame Fan
In Darth's Head
Member since Dec 2008
92635 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


rarely do I love blondes, but she is fine.


and she is nowhere near a butter face, tard






Back to top
Peazey
New Orleans Saints Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Apr 2012
6835 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


This is some really good stuff.





Back to top
  Replies (0)
SuperSaint
UNO Fan
Member since Sep 2007
75168 posts
 Online 

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


#9 scares me bc I've been a dirtbag a couple too many times. I'm hoping I've taken my licks.





Back to top
tgrbaitn08
USA Fan
Member since Dec 2007
36725 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


Oh dont get me wrong, I love some MM, love everything about her.....




















































but her face






Back to top
WikiTiger
LSU Fan
Member since Sep 2007
40721 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


These points are so accurate.

I predict that the ladies will avoid this thread.


quote:

Do not listen to what women have to say about women.


Spot on. Women give the worst advice ever about women, and how to get them. They are truly clueless.

quote:

Women are 95% a product of the relationship (or lack thereof) between they and their fathers.


Spot on again, especially the part about how you can't fix a broken girl.

quote:

but stay away from the 10's.


True again. Of course, this only becomes evident as you age. Nothing wrong with pursuing the hot ones for coitus, but don't settle down with them.



This post was edited on 6/27 at 11:01 am


Back to top
TH03
Notre Dame Fan
In Darth's Head
Member since Dec 2008
92635 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


that's your opinion, and I will not attack you for sharing it





Back to top
  Replies (0)
WikiTiger
LSU Fan
Member since Sep 2007
40721 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

It's a very rare thing, a woman at peace and comfortable with herself....so when you find one, say "I do" and keep her away from other women. Wanna see proof of this? Work along side alot of women. When one finds happiness, the others go about dismantling hers with ant-like industry. Nothing on earth is quite so destructive as women screwing with a happy one. It's a pretty safe bet that if your lady friends hang out with other girls, they will try (even unwittingly), to frick you up. Sorry girls, you know this one is true.



To go along with this one, there was a similar thread posted where one of the first points was how women always have to have something wrong. It could be major, it could be minor. But I guarantee you they will always have something wrong in their life.






Back to top
mikelbr
LSU Fan
Baton Rouge
Member since Apr 2008
14584 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

Item 6: Women, contrary to another urban legend, are shitbags too. They will have you convinced, if you talk to them enough, that they are the masters of reason and emotion. bullshite, fellas. They are contriving, maniacal masters of chaos and work feverishly against their own happiness sometimes. Nothing will disturb a woman so deeply to her core as true contentment. Some women shudder at the thought of a placid, pleasing life. It's a very rare thing, a woman at peace and comfortable with herself....so when you find one, say "I do" and keep her away from other women. Wanna see proof of this? Work along side alot of women. When one finds happiness, the others go about dismantling hers with ant-like industry. Nothing on earth is quite so destructive as women screwing with a happy one. It's a pretty safe bet that if your lady friends hang out with other girls, they will try (even unwittingly), to frick you up. Sorry girls, you know this one is true.



Right fricking here. I'll never get why single women think it's okay to convince married friends to EXTORT their husbands into letting them go on a girls only weekend trip to the Beau Rivage or heaven forbid Vegas. Nothing good comes from that. EVER.

eta: neither of minez did this to me.




This post was edited on 6/27 at 11:08 am


Back to top
  Replies (0)
Swoopin
Auburn Fan
Member since Jun 2011
16475 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


Remember this thread. It was great

The most insightful thing I took from it

quote:

When one finds happiness, the others go about dismantling hers with ant-like industry. Nothing on earth is quite so destructive as women screwing with a happy one. It's a pretty safe bet that if your lady friends hang out with other girls, they will try (even unwittingly), to frick you up. Sorry girls, you know this one is true.



This post was edited on 6/27 at 11:08 am


Back to top
I Love Bama
Alabama Fan
Alabama
Member since Nov 2007
32069 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


Bitches are so crazy.





Back to top
DallasTiger
USA Fan
THE Capital City
Member since Jan 2004
1881 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


I'm way past 25 and that list is spot on. Good stuff.





Back to top
  Replies (0)
braud2go
Southeastern LA Fan
Member since Nov 2010
202 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)








Back to top
  Replies (0)
skygod123
LSU Fan
Lafayette
Member since Nov 2007
27805 posts

re: How To Deal With Women (Warning -TLDR inside)


quote:

Spot on. Women give the worst advice ever about women, and how to get them. They are truly clueless.
do you blame us? how can anyone predict ilogical?






Back to top
  Replies (0)


Back to top