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Message
Why doesn’t everyone sign a pre-nup?
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:26 pm
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:26 pm
I’m not looking for a cynical “sign a prenup, because all women are whores” response, also not looking for “if you need to sign a prenup she’s a whore” response, I’m just looking for genuine answers.
Is there some kind of legal downside to it? The only downside to me seems like women don’t like it.
There’s no way in hell I’m not signing one if I ever get married (I’m 37 and never married). Divorce rate way too high and I’ve seen countless men get fricked over by women. This isn’t a case “well you’ll change your mind once you ____”, there is no way in hell I’m not signing one. Don’t get me wrong, the girl I’m with is amazing, marriage might be on the horizon and if I had to guess, I like my odds with her, but I have too much shite that I worked for before I even met her and the divorce rate is way too high for me to think I’m just better at decision making than the majority of all men.
I’m certainly not opposed to splitting things in a certain way that I see as fair, but all the shite I had before I met her? Half of my salary regardless of what she makes? Half of the house I bought?
This question has bugged me for a while. Thoughts?
Is there some kind of legal downside to it? The only downside to me seems like women don’t like it.
There’s no way in hell I’m not signing one if I ever get married (I’m 37 and never married). Divorce rate way too high and I’ve seen countless men get fricked over by women. This isn’t a case “well you’ll change your mind once you ____”, there is no way in hell I’m not signing one. Don’t get me wrong, the girl I’m with is amazing, marriage might be on the horizon and if I had to guess, I like my odds with her, but I have too much shite that I worked for before I even met her and the divorce rate is way too high for me to think I’m just better at decision making than the majority of all men.
I’m certainly not opposed to splitting things in a certain way that I see as fair, but all the shite I had before I met her? Half of my salary regardless of what she makes? Half of the house I bought?
This question has bugged me for a while. Thoughts?
This post was edited on 4/22/24 at 12:27 pm
49
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:27 pm to TN Tygah
Depends if you're the poor in the relationship.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:27 pm to TN Tygah
If you're thinking divorce going in, it's a self fulfilling prophecy.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:27 pm to TN Tygah
I did not my first marriage because I was young and felt like it would be weird to ask that. I will next time no doubt but now have kids who I want to get my money so need them protected.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:30 pm to TN Tygah
A pre-nup is not to protect what you enter the marriage with. All assets and debts you enter into the marriage with are yours alone as your separate property. A pre-nup only opts out of the community property regime moving forward.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:30 pm to TN Tygah
People who don’t want an actual commitment seem to be simply not getting married these days. You don’t need the charade anymore if that’s where you are, you know?
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:31 pm to TN Tygah
Because I think we had $350 in our bank accounts put together
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:31 pm to Tvilletiger
quote:What if new wife has more money than you?
I did not my first marriage because I was young and felt like it would be weird to ask that. I will next time no doubt but now have kids who I want to get my money so need them protected.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:32 pm to TN Tygah
People change as they age. Men basically become indentured servants in bad marriages if they can't afford to lose half their shite.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:32 pm to TN Tygah
quote:
Don’t get me wrong, the girl I’m with is amazing, marriage might be on the horizon and if I had to guess, I like my odds with her
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:33 pm to TN Tygah
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:33 pm to TN Tygah
I am a widow now and if I ever get remarried I would make my future husband sign a prenup because the money my first husband left us is for my children. On the same assumption I would sign a prenup with the 2 husband because his money belongs to his kids.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:33 pm to TN Tygah
quote:
Half of my salary regardless of what she makes? Half of the house I bought?
Did you own the house outright before marriage? If not, even with a prenup she will get to have a stake in a portion of that asset. Probably not 50%, but most likely 50% of the principal amount that was paid during the marriage
I don't think the 1/2 your salary no matter what she makes is a thing; but when it comes to alimony, unless she did one of the specific things you list in your prenup, she most likely will be eligible for some alimony.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:34 pm to TN Tygah
I didn’t have shite when I got married.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:35 pm to TN Tygah
OP, of course.
But the reality is making transactional/contingent moves for a life change that's not *supposed* to be transactional or contingent rubs people the wrong way for obvious reasons.
The reality is that the only prenups I'm aware of are ones that arise upon...divorce. So the success rate is like 0%. But I'll say that the ones I've seen where it followed a mostly long, productive marriage tend to be ones forced upon the couple. Which makes some sense. "We don't really want this but it's a requirement of her dad and we'll do it to appease our family" takes some of the sting out of the first paragraph above.
But the reality is making transactional/contingent moves for a life change that's not *supposed* to be transactional or contingent rubs people the wrong way for obvious reasons.
The reality is that the only prenups I'm aware of are ones that arise upon...divorce. So the success rate is like 0%. But I'll say that the ones I've seen where it followed a mostly long, productive marriage tend to be ones forced upon the couple. Which makes some sense. "We don't really want this but it's a requirement of her dad and we'll do it to appease our family" takes some of the sting out of the first paragraph above.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:36 pm to TN Tygah
quote:
Why doesn’t everyone sign a pre-nup?
Introduces doubt at the very beginning of the marriage.
Marriage is hard enough as it is, why would want something that is just going to make it harder.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:37 pm to TN Tygah
I made my wife sign a prenup. It was non-negotiable and I have a significant amount of assets
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:45 pm to TN Tygah
quote:
but I have too much shite that I worked for before I even met her
She’s only entitled to half of what you earn while married.
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:46 pm to TN Tygah
Neither of us had any money when we got married 
Posted on 4/22/24 at 12:47 pm to Keyser Sooieze
quote:
Keyser Sooieze
You are aware that the divorce rate is over 50%, right?
I keep forgetting most of the people I’m responding to have never left Louisiana.
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