re: Complicated marriage/legal question involving finances

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She needs a prescribing psychiatrist rather than therapy in the long run.

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She would not just jump to a psychiatrist but she would see a therapist (she just hadn’t yet) …i know that a therapist would see the oddnes and could gently push her to a psychiatrists

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I've been around plenty of drug addicts, and I'm not saying that's the case here, but the symptoms are the same.

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And the symptoms (minus the cash withdrawals) have been evident for about 7-8mos now…the ATM stuff started like two weeks ago


So maybe she picked up doing drugs a couple weeks ago but i don’t think it’s been for the past 7-8mos

She’s doing drugs and the drug dealer. Lawyer up immediately

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On Thursday, i decided to open up a separate account and once i got my early direct deposit on Friday, i quickly transferred to my new account (same bank for ease of transfers)

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Smart move. You can't get it back, once it is gone.

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February, she got arrested for DV-

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Whoa. Not ok at all.

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she took my keys/phone for 2hrs and refused to give them to me

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This is not ok at all either.

I’m very sorry you’re dealing with this. You don’t deserve it. I’m a woman and can’t make sense of her actions.

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Her sister is bipolar - her mother is a hoarder so mental health is evident Drugs/Cheating - again, ppl on here have said I’m naive/gullible etc but it could be one of these but when i say I’ve explored those two options as deep as i could - i have and haven’t seen it. I’m not blindly ignoring it either bc in Florida, substance abuse can be used to Baker Act Cheating …possibly but no evidence yet

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Sounds like a psychotic break but keep in mind that can be triggered from latent mental health issues OR drugs. Stimulant psychosis is real. Has she not been sleeping or staying up really late? If someone takes higher doses of stimulants and/or loses too much sleep, they start acting weird like you describe but their movements also becomes kind of jerky and erratic.
One thing I can tell you about dealing with people that are paranoid or delusional is that disagreeing with them or telling them they are crazy only makes you part of the conspiracy against them. Whenever she brings up somebody hacking her phone, go along with it, tell her your phone is acting weird too and try to get her to open up. Keep notes and see where it goes.

You're a good man 850, I pray that your wife gets some help and y'all can heal as a family.

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And the symptoms (minus the cash withdrawals) have been evident for about 7-8mos now…the ATM stuff started like two weeks ago

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I obviously don't know you or your wife. Did she have any prescription drug use in her history? It's not normal at all for someone to go from sober to heroin all the sudden. So if not, that sort of collapse is unlikely imo.

Like someone else said it could be a psychotic break due to drugs. One of the options is going on.
Gone bat shite crazy- very possible

Cheating- looking less likely, but I would never completely rule it out. It could be to make you ask for divorce because she feels guilty.

Drugs- could be the only culprit but it could also create the previous 2 options. Female Cousin-in-law went this rout, and it cause the the above mentions. To the point she was whored out on Craig’s list for drugs/money. She had 2 boys and was married at the time. I’m talking guy shaved her head to show dominance, beat her and even sent videos to her mom trying to make her leave the CIL alone. It was bad, but she finally turned around and got better afterSHE MADE HER MIND UP TO DO It. Only so much you can do until they decide it is what they want to do.

I don’t know if anyone mentioned putting an AirTag in her car or purse and putting a video recorder or audio recorder the vehicle you bought for her to ride in. I had a buddy that was married to a nurse and he did that and confronted her with the recording. They are still married, but it was rough for a while because of her cheating and they had 2 young daughters. As far as I know, it made saved his marriage. She realized what she could and would lose. She was sleeping with one of the ER doctors, but his family owned several thousand acres and are farmers. He also had his own stuff to straighten out regarding coke and partying, but it worked out for the best.
Point is you can put a recorder in her vehicle that you bought with your own money and rule out what isn’t causing the issue. If it isn’t legal you just can’t use it in court. Talk to a lawyer about it. It might confirm which way you need to go

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One thing I can tell you about dealing with people that are paranoid or delusional is that disagreeing with them or telling them they are crazy only makes you part of the conspiracy against them.

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She hasn’t “labeled” me against her but she has said that I’ve been/being influenced by “them”

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You're a good man 850, I pray that your wife gets some help and y'all can heal as a family.

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This almost made me cry…it’s been a hard 3mos for sure but i have faith/hope but somedays i don’t and it gets dark - i know my kids need a sane person so i push through the fog

I don’t mean to be overly dramatic, but this reminds me of the veterinarian that killed a cop around Bay St Louis. If it was a guy, I don’t think she’d bring a kid with her. Same with gambling; a minor complicates going to a casino. The paranoia, the random withdrawals, the DV…sounds like it could be a psychotic break. You need to get your child away from her.