re: Complicated marriage/legal question involving finances

The reason you use cash is because you don't want a trail on what you're spending the money on. The fact you're telling her to stop, opening up a separate account and she continues to pull money out is telling you something. She's up to something she doesn't want you to know about. If she's not willing to clear the air she's going the Bill Clinton route of deny deny deny. It's up to you if you're gonna allow it to continue. She's not working. It's your money she's spending and she's not willing to tell you what's she's spending it on. No one pays bills via cash and certainly with no receipts.