re: Complicated marriage/legal question involving finances

Does she always " pay bills " in cash? C'mon man.

You did the right thing moving your pay to a private account and you need to pay the bills.

Move as much of your money to accounts you control.

If you end up divorcing the court can determine what you each receive. Discharge as many debts as you can while you have control so you have a clean ledger and less to resolve later.